December 1 – One Word.

December 1 – One Word. Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you?
(Author: Gwen Bell)

AMBIVALENT

I started with the word Hell. Then change. But really, I wanted to use both (Hellish changes). Had I written this post in March, it would have been Hell. Or Change (or bad changes), but since mid October I've been making it a personal mission to really try to keep a positive outlook on life, but even with that, I'm an absolutely indecisive person in general, so I thought about ambivalence, a word I love. I googled it and found some alternates that may help explain this more than just my basic indecisiveness. I read inconclusive. I would have used that, but I feel like ambivalent speaks more to some of the negativity, the loss and pain I've suffered this year but also offers an inconclusive view on if I'm going to let the bad stuff define me or if I'm going to use it to move forward. I'm hopeful that I will look back at most of the bad this year has offered as a life lesson and that I'll move forward with that knowledge and a different outlook to see real change in the next year.

As far as one word for 2011? I'm torn. I'd love to say Innovation or Pride or even just plain happy, but I'm not sure on any of those. I guess I'll be optimistic and just hope that in 2011 CONFIDENT will be my word. Confident that I've done what I could, confident in what I'll be doing then and confident in who I am as a person.